My husband and I have been married for almost twenty years.  I am a businesswoman who is as comfortable sitting in the boardroom as I am the Matriarch of my home.  Over the years we have gradually moved toward our respective roles in the Marriage.  We both understood that I was the Dominant partner when we walked down the aisle.  I maintained my maiden name to signify my independence. 

A few years after we married I became aware of his addiction to pornography and compulsive sexual behaviors and his fetish for women's underwear.  His issues of sexual addiction and compulsivity resulted in him engaging in several inappropriate sexual encounters and his addiction to philandering caused our Marriage to reach a near breaking point.  It was after an episode that I knew things needed to be addressed and told him that I'd decided to "take absolute charge" of our relationship and put an end to his irresponsible behavior once and for all.  He was given no choice in the matter if he chose to remain married to me. 

He was appropriately punished for his behavior behind our bedroom door and I initiated a new model for our relationship.  I advised him that he would accept my leadership and our relationship from that point forward became 'Wife-Led.'  It was automatic that I assumed all of the critical  decsions for us as a couple and for our family unit.  I have natural leadership abilities and have Superior intellectual, emotional and spiritual capabilities.  He is frequently reminded of my expectations while he is worshiping me while I sit elevated above him on my throne.  He is to cooperative, be subordinate and defer to me.  He is allowed to ride the Queen only when I feel he has appropriately earned his priveleges to give me my pleasure. 

I believe that most males are submissive at their core and have a place in Marriage which is to love, honor and adore a Dominant Female.  My husband understands that it is not his place to question or dispute my judgment about what I decide to be best.  At the center of my beliefs are my spirituality and that living within a Female-Led Matriarchal relationship is essential to happiness.  My husband has been been trained over the years to handle many of the domestic chores of our household such as performing the grocery shopping, handling the laundry, dishes, cleaning and carpooling. 

Like most submissive males, my husband has struggled with his sexual desires and his need for physical intimacy; sex has always been very important to him but like many middle aged men he has erection and ejaculation difficulties; additionally he has depression and anxiety issues.  I am helping him deal with many of his personal and sexual problems, I frequently will ask him, "how are things going for you, darling," and he knows exactly what I mean.

When I initiate sex I expect his adoration of my body and to worship me at the altar of my Female sensuality.  My sex drive is subtle and highly complex.  He respects me as the Goddess Queen who has given birth to our three children.  Now as a mature Woman in my forties, I expect him to praise my Female form as I receive my pleasure from his tongue as he lowers himself to give me pleasure and enjoyment.  I expect him to lower himself with reverence and express his adoration to me as I hold open my folds and allow him to enjoy the taste and smell of my Womanly treasure as my nectar flows.  My husband has accepted that his mouth is to be filled with my sweetness and that his primary sex organ to giving me 'my pleasure' is his tongue.  Our basic position when making love is his 'Mouth to My Lips' position.  I am elevated above him and able to shift my body, pull his head toward me and direct him as I remind him of my many Womanly attributes when he worships below me.  I have a full and round body with a natural growth of hair that envelops my triangle; my husband understands to keep his genitals smooth without any traces of hair.  I want him to be reminded of his submissive role when he looks and touches himself.  His silky smooth shaft is only allowed to penetrate me when I decide.  Typically, I must hold his soft penis firmly to help him achieve and maintain an erection that is sufficient to glide into my wet opening. 

He understands that he will not begin his active thrusting until I signal him that I am ready.  Until then I am comfortably positioned I firmly hold him inside of me to support his delicately small shaft.  Once the signal is given I expect my male to respond with vigourous and active thrusts.  His excitement is always immediate but he is frequently unable to cum as he must stop to regain his composure.  It is not unusual that he becomes limp and loses his erection.  When I have tired of this activity, I give him a few final moments to finish and empty himself (if he can) into my body with his release.  Often he is unable and I have him get me towels to clean up.

I expect my male to always behave in a respectful and deferential manner and to me and to treat me as a Queen.  I am not at all tolerant of any selfish or inconsiderate behavior.  I encourage all men to submit completely; not just sexually as that is the easy part.  By surrendering completely to a Woman, a relationship can achieve a deep spiritual quality.  

After I made the commitment to deal with and confront the issues, I had him make an appointment with a female friendly counselor who supported my view on what it meant to be living within a 'Female-Led' relationship.  With her involvement as his coach and by both of us reading and following the principles outlined within the excellent Elise Sutton book, Female Domination, we both gained tremendous insight into his submissive male sexuality.  Reading this book helped me win the credibility battle with him on many issues of his sexuality. 

My ultimate goal was to preserve the marriage and not to break it up, but this was not an easy decision.  My submissive husband felt he was in a trap and believed he was demonized by his addictions and did not know how to initiate change in the behaviors or in his life.  By taking control of his activites in the home and at work and holding him accountable to me as he reported to me on the finances, all domestic decisons and all activites in the bedroom I was able to help him accept his once secret inner-femininity and begin his healing and recovery process.  

Submissive Male Sexuality  

My male knows he is is to be worshipful towards me in and out of the bedroom.  Orally serving a Woman is a common first step for many Dominant Women to taking control.  The submissive male is both sexually aroused and submissively stimulated as he lowers himself to serve a Woman at her anus or vulva.  Wife Worship is an important component of a 'Female-Led' relationship.  The Female Vulva and Anus signify Female Domination to the submissive male.  A submissive male has an innate need to perform submissve acts of worship when interacting with a Dominant Female.  The desire for these acts is strong and deeply embedded within the soul of the submissive male.     

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